First published in the February 2002 issue of Street Machine

The 2002 5.6-litre 250kW Tickford TS50 is the greatest Falcon road car ever built. Ever! For its intended purpose, it is better than any GT or GTHO in history. Oh, and while we’re at it, the TS50 is probably the best high-performance sedan Australia has ever produced.

I’m not undermining Ford’s GT heritage. Far from it. I agree with the 30 years worth of exhaustive documentation stating that Ford’s legendary 60s muscle represents Australia’s hardest-edged street animals, boasting record-breaking quarter mile times and top speed figures. But grand touring – hence the revered and coveted Grand Touring Handling Option (GTHO) badge – is what these war birds were built for, regardless of drag strip time slips. Their intended purpose was to slice through twisty mountain curves and they did so with aplomb.

Not quite as well documented is how much tweaking, tuning, blueprinting, correcting and other extensive preparation was required before supposedly race-ready showroom Falcons were fit for tackling The Mountain. No amount of misty-eyed romanticism can correct front-heavy weight distribution, incorrect suspension location points and poor factory geometry, inconsistent distributor curves, inaccurate piston stroke length and poorly balanced rotating mass. Put simply, production Falcons of the 60s were let down by manufacturing quality of that era, regardless of how prodigious the specification list was.

At one level, cars like the current Tickfords benefit enormously from 30 years of manufacturing accuracy and refinement. So when engineers slightly alter ignition curves, or someone such as designated test pilot John Bowe suggests minute changes to improve chassis balance, every single production car gets the same tangible detailed improvement. I drove six different TS and TE models during our Tassie test and they all felt identical.

Add to this Ford’s almost fanatical desire to improve image and sales by throwing unprecedented resources – such as the new hand-built, blueprinted stroked Windsor V8s, for example – into building the best grand touring sedan they possibly can. The result is a spectacular driving experience and a car capable of going much quicker than most will have the balls to discover.

Let’s get the whole straight-line speed thing over with. Both the current TS50 and TE50 with identical drivelines (see more below) will, on their best day, peel off 13.9sec over the quarter mile and crack 100 clicks from nothing in 5.8sec. With only two runs and the wrong fuel, our sister magazine Wheels nailed 14.1sec and 6.0sec respectively (December 2001 issue).

For the record, the nearest Ford GT rival is the XW GTHO Phase II (14.2sec for 0-400m, 6.4sec for 0-60mph, Wheels, November 1970), while the XY GTHO Phase III comes in fourth quickest (14.7sec for 0-400m, 6.4sec for 0-60mph, Wheels, October 1971). And unless your mates screaming “bloody bullshit!” down the pub can claim a more reputable and accurate three-decade long testing source, the arguments stop right here. Yep, the new models are the quickest production Falcons ever.

But this is only sheer acceleration and, therefore, only one element of why the TS50 is so impressive. Rapid strip times do not make a true grand tourer. You might as well go and throw a worked Clevo in a Capri – it’s ultimately cheaper, easier and quicker. The same can be said for outright horsepower. Screwing 250kW from a Windsor ain’t hard, unless you’re trying to build an engine as damn good as the TS50’s Windsor. Few V8 engines come anywhere near the hand-built, balanced and blueprinted 5.6-litre stroker’s liquid-smooth power delivery and Gumby-like flexibility.

Turn the key and it hums along at idle, but prod the loud pedal and you’ll get the deepest, throatiest and crispest note in the business. And, boy, is it tractable! It has more torque under 2000rpm than the 220kW XR8 motor does at its peak. Make no mistake though, this ain’t no truck donk! It’s a surging 500Nm and a pull-from-anywhere torque band that’s spread wide enough to bridge Bass Strait. Ford are understandably very proud of the motor but, once again, it’s only one element of the package. Problem is, the power doesn’t really smack you in the back of the head, making the motor one of the TS50’s least inspiring mechanical assets.

Both T and XR series Falcons have been praised in recent times for their nimble and responsive chassis, but one look at those massive bright red Italian Brembo stoppers (a cool $5000 option over base price), ABS as standard and those very sweet top-shelf Koni shocks indicate how serious Ford is about upping the performance ante.

There are few tougher grand touring tests than the Targa Tasmania route. Six cars, two days and over 1000 kilometres of Australia’s most challenging ribbons of unforgiving blacktop. This is territory where you truly discover how good greatness is, and where shiny wheels and superficial gimmicks won’t save a dog of a car. It’s a risky place to plonk a journo with the keys to the prime steed, as we sometimes do stupid things in other people’s cars…

Boy can this thing corner! Hypothetically, a journo might tackle 45km/h-rated switchbacks at, say, 100 clicks. At this velocity, the TS50 will cut a perfect line through even the most awkward off-camber curves with such effortless composure you’d almost believe the car would shut itself down at any moment out of sheer boredom. With barely any noise from the amazingly durable Dunlop SP9000s, the chassis feels like it’s only doing about seven 10ths even though you’re eating up real estate at a rapid pace.

Push even harder and the chassis remains unbelievably secure and feels very nimble considering its hefty 1700-odd kilo weight. The nose just points into corners with scalpel-like precision, offering supreme communication through the light but evenly-weighted MOMO tiller. The Windsor feels like it was bred to buzz between four and five grand and when you weld the throttle mid-apex the rear end simply hunkers down and catapults you out the other side like it’s on rails.

The bum is so adhesive in the dry that you’d be forgiven believing that there were giant bitumen magnets loaded in the boot; it just refuses to come unstuck unless you’re being completely stupid. Through rapid-fire bends, the body plants itself flatter than the Nullarbor and near perfect dampening soaks up severe road imperfections and potholes as if they were an optical illusion.

The brakes have great progressive bite. They’ll scrub off velocity from beyond the idiot zone with confidence time and time again without the hint of fade. Just as impressive is the fact that we punished these cars severely at nine 10ths for an hour at a time. Even after consecutive 140km-long stints, the TS50 remained as fresh and unfazed as a quick trip to the corner shop for milk and bread.

With only one shot at the route’s 10,000-odd challenging corners, it’s easy to get caught plunging way too hot into a tightening sweeper-come-hairpin doing, say, 135 clicks when the sign clearly states 50km/h. Silly stuff, really, because the margin for error is slim when you’ve got a single lane lined with sheer rock face on one side of the black stuff and a sheer drop if you punch the Armco on the other. But even under savage lift-off and trouncing on the picks right in the “holy shit!” zone, the TS50’s chassis just gracefully breaks into a gentle four-wheel drift with predictable poise and instinctively telepathic control while the Dunlops try to bite back into the bitumen. Idiotproof? The blue beast must have saved me from myself about half a dozen times during the trip.

Rounding off a superb package of engine, suspension and brakes are the gearbox offerings. While the smooth throw and positive gating of the five-speed Tremec manual makes Holden’s six-speed feel agricultural, it’s the ESS (Electronic Sports Shift) automatic that absolutely blows any other stab-the-throttle-and-wait Aussie slushbox back into the Dark Ages. While it took a little acclimatisation, the ESS system can fire up and down the five close ratios ‘speeds’ (four gears, plus the lock-up converter makes five) at a touch of the wheel-mounted buttons. Given F1-type paddles, it’d be perfect. Shifts are so buttery smooth and instantaneous that down- and up-changing mid-corner becomes a safe and very effective new world to explore. With practice, this could well be a quicker system for grand touring gear changing than a manual. It’s that good.

So all the important ingredients are there, but what about the dressing? The V8 Supercar-inspired TS50 body is a good step in the right direction at transforming Australia’s most universally disliked AU body shape. In fact, watching one blast through curves from behind, the TS50 evokes more of that authentic, hunkered-down race car attitude than any HSV could hope for. The wings and things also square up the AU’s droopy arse end nicely.

Inside, Tickford’s traditional two-toned leather and modern almost-black plastic finishes are plush, comfortable and refined, but ultimately a bit too sumptuous. Mind you, most customers will expect more for the (Brembo-equipped) TS50’s entry price of around $72,000. One big gripe is that during heated back-road sprints you’ll be sliding around on those leather seats like an air hockey puck well before the chassis reaches the fun zone. With that said, it’s such a comfortable and unfatiguing environment that you’ll only ever want to egress for PULP or a pee.

Herein lies the problem. The TS50 mixes superb boy racer engineering with the compromise of luxury expected by the upper management crowd who can actually afford to buy one. But regardless of sticker price, it has and does almost everything you’d expect of Falcon fit to wear the badge GTHO, and then some. And yet Tickford go and call it something meaningless like TS50…

I might be a chump journo – not a pimple on a Ford executive’s arse – but here’s what I reckon the Blue Oval boys should do. Paint the TS50 silver and add black or white 19in wheels (think: Lowndes race car), throw in a pair of Recaro-type sports seats in it, whip 250 kilos worth of luxo-crap out of it and, for God’s sake, dump the meaningless TS50 name (what the hell does it actually mean?). If it’s not fit for the GT name, call it Falcon Cobra RS, RS250, Phase IVXII or whatever; something to give a true performance benchmark an image and identity that will push people’s buttons!

It would be a shame for Tickford’s awesome steed to go the same way of HSV’s Group A Commodores of the early 90s; commercial showroom failures but now revered with hallowed tones and worshipped by the marque faithful. Right here and now, can Ford afford to wait 10 years for this great car to have it’s due respect? I don’t think so either.

T what?!

Do you know the differences between a TE50 and TS50? Neither do most. Here’s the lowdown. At $57,350 (manual) to $58,350 (auto), the TE50 is about eight and half grand less than the TS50, which comes in at $66,950 (man and auto). Both cars share the same hand-built 250kW stroker engine, brakes, suspension and driveline, although the top-shelf Konis are a $1500 option on the TE50 (TS50 gets ’em as standard) and you can only get the neato ESS sequential-style shift in the more expensive TS50. High performance Brembo brakes are $5350 extra on both models and each get a unique 18x8in alloy wheel design. Basically, they’re mechanically identical.

The major difference between the two cars is in the core vehicle that each are based off. The TE50 has Falcon appointments (air-con) while the TS50 has Fairmont Ghia luxuries, such as climate control. The more expensive TS50 is about 50kg heavier. So there you go.

GT or not GT?

If the current TS50 is not a true GT, then how far must the bar be raised before Ford resurrect the fabled name once again? “GT and GTHO are the most respected and revered names in Australian motoring; much more than Monaro, GTS and all of the others,” says Tickford boss David Flint. “We’ve had a few soft cars over the years and called them GTs, so we’re very, very reluctant to associate the GT name with an average car.”

So how much higher should the bar be raised before GT returns? “When we (Ford) produce a car that’s undeniably better than all others on the market,” he smiles. A 300kW-plus 2003 GTHO Falcon? You have been warned, HSV